Evidence-Based Nursing Practice - 952 Words

Running head: EVIDENCE-BASED NURSING PRACTICE Evidence-Based Nursing Practice Karen Medley Walden University NURS 4000 Section 05, Research and Scholarship for Evidence-Based Practice) July 22, 2012 Abstract For patients that have indwelling catheters, with the evidence-based practice and standards of care, UTI’s does still continue to be an ongoing problem today. In one of the large hospitals in my area had recently developed a poster and video approach with special focus on alternatives to urinary catheterization, removing catheters early, and the reinforcement of sterile technique prior insertion and foley catheter care were used to educate nursing staff and improve outcomes. The purpose of this paper is to educate nursing on†¦show more content†¦The lower income communities are probably more affected. The cost of a single episode to treat UTI’s ranges from $980-$2900, depending on the presence of the bacteremia (Saint, 2000). Differences in care based on evidence Sterile technique is required for insertion of an indwelling urinary catheter in the hospital setting, but clean technique can be used for intermittent catheterization in non-acute settings. By itself, sterile technique on insertion doesnt prevent UTI’s. Prevention of UTI’s depends on knowledge of causes, proper care techniques, and early catheter removal. Nurses are taught early on in school that sterile technique helps to reduce infections. It was drilled in our heads the entire time and now to have the evidence tell us that early catheter removal, along with proper technique good hand hygiene is the key to reduce UTI’s. Summary UTI’s is an all too common problem that causes unnecessary distress to patients and delays their recovery during their hospital stay. All healthcare professionals should adhere to these good practice points that could reduce the risk of UTI’s and assure staff that they are demonstrating best practice in their care. References Burke J.P. (2003). Infection control- a problem for patient safety. New England Journal Medicine, 348(7):651-656. Hobbs F.B. (2001).The elderly population. US Census Bureau, PopulationShow MoreRelatedEvidence Based Practice in Nursing1565 Words   |  7 PagesTitle: Evidence Based Practice in Nursing Name Course Tutor April 20th, 2013 Introduction The paper herein provides a critical discussion of evidence based practice (EBP) in nursing. It clearly elaborates on the meaning and definition of EBP as used by nurses as well as the importance of evidence based decision making as it relates to nursing care. 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British Appeasement Essay Research Paper TITLE Why free essay sample

British Appeasement Essay, Research Paper Title: Why did the British authorities follow a policy of calming in the 1930s? After World War I Germany limped back, creaming its lesions that the Treaty of Versailles had so pitilessly rubbed in salt. As one looks back on the events taking up to World War II it has to be asked whether France and England helped to get down World War II by their actions at Versailles. It seems that the retaliation that the Allies took at the Treaty came back to stalk them with the aggression of Hitler in 1936. However, we can non fault Neville Chamberlain for something with which he had no portion. Chamberlain? s actions in the old ages 1936 to 1939 are adequate to assist one appreciate the quandary he found himself in. Chamberlain did non, in the beginning, gain precisely what Hitler was after. Hitler was after retribution for Germany because of the Treaty of Versailles, but Chamberlain did non gain that Hitler was after domination of Europe. When confronted about Germany? s program to assail Czechoslovakia Chamberlain responded, # 8220 ; I think it would be incorrect to presume that the German authorities has any purpose of making such. # 8221 ; The eyes of the universe were on Chamberlain? s every move, criticising, praising, and waiting. With the force per unit area of the universe on his shoulders Chamberlain proceeded carefully non desiring the tensenesss to detonate. Historically, Britain had followed a foreign policy of calming and non acquiring involved with the remainder of Europe. Therefore in the 1920s, Britain appeased Weimar Germany with the purpose of accomplishing justness, and paid the monetary value of cut downing reparations and handling Germany as an equal. In the 1930s Britain appeased Hitler # 8217 ; s Germany with the purpose of security and paying the monetary value of turning a blind oculus to Germany # 8217 ; s aspirations. This essay shall offer analysis on Chamberlain # 8217 ; s personal g rounds to follow calming, the grounds on behalf of Britain and the grounds due to the positions of the British populace. A description of the class of calming will be given, and statements for and against Chamberlain # 8217 ; s usage of calming against Hitler will be given. Thus the inquiry as to # 8220 ; why did the British authorities follow a policy of calming in the 1930s # 8221 ; will be addressed and grounds will be given as to whether or non this policy was effectual in accomplishing its purpose. After World War 1, Britain wanted a purged Germany to take her topographic point among European states one time once more. Many of the British opinion category preferred the Germans to the Gallic. The British treated Hitler as a responsible solon who would maintain his deals. He was in a responsible place and had to be treated like a caput of province. They believed that if Hitler was given plenty environing district and some settlements there was a point at which he would go sensible, and war would be averted. In May 1937, Neville Chamberlain became Prime Minister. He saw Britain # 8217 ; s function as that of the conciliator # 8211 ; the lone hope if war was to be avoided in Europe, as the USA was non willing to be involved and France was no aid. Britain was isolated so there was no strong ally to assist her trade with Hitler. She even tried to do friendly relationship with Mussolini in 1937. Chamberlain distrusted Stalin and Communism. Merely in 1939 did he seek to make an apprehension with Stalin, and many historiographers think that even so it was an insincere effort on both sides. It failed anyway as Stalin made the Nazi-Soviet Pact alternatively in August 1939. Chamberlain had a deep personal horror of war. Many close relations or friends had died in the old universe war, and it is apprehensible that this was one ground that he tried so difficult to debar war. But he was inclined to trust on his ain opinion and made some large mistakes. Besides, Britain was non ready for war. She had spent less on weaponries in the thirtiess due to the Depression. Chamberlain thought that the societal jobs should come foremost. Slowly coming out of the economic depression that followed World War I the British people wanted to avoid war at all costs. The wants of the people were embodied in their leader. Chamberlain was after one thing: to maintain Great Britain out of war. His logical thinking in pacifying Hitler was that of giving a small alternatively of giving much through war. It could be said that Neville Chamberlain was frozen by fright. We can non fault him for being fearful, but many of his actions were non merely fearful but besides finally lifeles sly for many people. In February 1938, Anthony Eden the Foreign Secretary resigned. He did non hold with Chamberlain # 8217 ; s attack, as he wanted to trust on corporate security instead than calming. Lord Halifax became the new Foreign Secretary. He agreed with the policy of calming and a personal attack to Hitler. In September 1938, Chamberlain made three visits to pacify Hitler # 8211 ; in Berchtesgaden, in Godesberg and Munich. However, Calvocoressi and Wint in their book # 8220 ; Total War # 8221 ; argue that this policy was foolish and contributed to longer war when it did come. They say that Britain should hold fought in 1938 over Czechoslovakia. Chamberlain said Britain was non ready and would hold lost. But Calvocoressi and Wint say that Germany was non ready either and Czechoslovakia was the lone state ready and willing to contend in 1938. She had a good armaments industry and immense munitions and a really good equipt ground forces. By allowing Hitler return over Czechoslovakia in Septemb er 1938 and March 1939, they let him hold all the Czech planes, armored combat vehicles, guns etc for his ain usage, and the immense end product of Czech mills to supplement German end product # 8211 ; all without a battle. Calvocoressi and Wint say that this was # 8220 ; black # 8221 ; and # 8220 ; foolish # 8221 ; . It was black in that Britain let down an ally and foolish in that they made conflict worse by proroguing it and so, they about lost it. It was true that France was non ready to assist # 8211 ; but she collapsed in six hebdomads in 1940, and could barely hold done much worse in 1938. Besides it was true that British aircraft production was behind German production and had improved by 1940. But Calvocoressi and Wint argue that if Germany had had to contend Czechoslovakia at the same clip they could non hold bombarded Britain from the air in 1938 in the same manner as they did in the Battle of Britain in 1940. At place, Britain faced public protest over the failure to assist Czechoslovakia in March 1939. Chamberlain justified it by indicating out the disunity between Czechs and Slovaks and the possibility that Czechoslovakia would interrupt up anyway. Then Chamberlain made a expansive diplomatic gestur vitamin E in March 1939 as he gave a warrant to Poland of military protection if Germany attacked. The British-French confederation pledged to aide Poland with all available power â€Å"†¦in the event of any action which clearly threatened Polish independency and which the Polish Government consequently considered it critical to defy with their national forces.† Calvocoressi and Wint point out that this is a reversal of British Foreign Policy. For 20 old ages she had avoided accepting duty for stableness in Eastern Europe, but she was now accepting it. Appeasement was backlashing, as Chamberlain was acquiring in deep over his caput and ended up holding to support Poland, which he had neer been prepared to make. Britain would necessitate the aid of the USSR – Poland’s eastern neighbour – to do the warrant effectual. So, Britain and France negotiated with Stalin throughout the summer of 1939 – four months of complicated diplomatic tactics. Chambe rlain wanted to show Hitler with a solid diplomatic forepart against him. But he truly distrusted the USSR and had non much assurance in her military strength. Stalin played along as he wanted clip and infinite. Finally he opted for the treaty with Germany as the best manner of protecting his ain involvements. So this component of British foreign policy was gone. In fact the failure of the policy of calming to forestall war was black in that it was really a cause of World War II. The British authorities even tried to pacify Hitler economically. In the words of H.N. Brailsford England tried to purchase peace, if possible, without direct loss to oneself. Robert S Hudson, caput of the English Board of Trade gave Hitler a billion-pound loan. Yet, a loan for defense mechanism arms was denied to Poland who was build uping to support itself against Hitler. In an article entitled # 8220 ; England Shows Her Colours # 8221 ; it was stated, # 8220 ; Britain is non merely being cowed by the attackers: she systematically, in action, gives them assistance. # 8221 ; It seems that Chamberlain? s fright caused myopia in that he acted at the minute weighing the long-run effects of his actions. Then on the 1st September 1939 Germany invaded Poland and on the 3rd September Britain and France declared war on Germany. The policy failed to debar war. Calvocoressi and Wint say that Britain helped to convey about the war by non moving sooner. They suggest Britain should hold acted over the Rhineland in 1936. But antagonistic statement could be made that Britain and France would hold helped unify the Germans behind Hitler if they had humiliated him at that phase. It is true that we know the German military personnels had instructions to retreat if France fought # 8211 ; but it is arguable that the struggle would hold been postponed. Britain should hold defended Czechoslovakia in 1938 and 1939. It would hold been a speedy war in 1938. There are statements against this opinion excessively. We know that Hitler neer intended a long war of the type that came. His readyings indicate that he expected a series of short runs instead than entire war. Action in 1938 might hold led to this # 8211 ; a different war instead than no war. German generals were plotting to take Hitler in 1938. If Britain and France had faced up to Hitler, the generals might hold been successful, but there was no manner of turn outing this. We can oppugn the wisdom of Britain # 8217 ; s actions, but there is no manner of stating decidedly that any other class of action would surely hold been better. The League of Nations had failed to keep Hitler # 8211 ; it was powerless against any of its members who truly wanted to interrupt the regulations. Britain was in a slightly similar state of affairs. She made errors but besides bought clip in 1938-1939 which she used to rearm ( the job was that this besides gave Hitler clip ) . Basically, Britain # 8217 ; s leaders were profoundly dying to avoid war and so were loath to believe that any responsible solon would utilize war to acquire his ain manner and carry through his purposes. Britain treated Hitler as a responsible solon and possibly that was the biggest error of all. As we see Chamberlain seeking urgently to remain out of war we besides see a adult male compromising values because of fright. The manners of Chamberlain as compared to Hitler is that of a weak kid confro nting a bully. Hitler refused to endorse down piece Chamberlain took elephantine stairss rearward giving Hitler more clip. Chamberlain? s calming and vacillation allowed Hitler the severely needed clip to better fix himself for war. In a sense Chamberlain prolonged the war and allowed greater devastation that may hold been avoided. The weight of devastation of Europe must weigh to a great extent on the scruples of the members of the British authorities because they know they may hold been able to forestall some of the devastation and devastation caused by the war. In the late thirtiess, France was divided politically and was unwilling to move against Germany without Britain # 8217 ; s assist. The USA was in glorious isolation, Italy was allied with Germany and the USSR was prosecuting her ain purposes. Therefore Britain dominated Europe # 8217 ; s reaction to Hitler and has been accused of prosecuting a class, which led to war. Undoubtedly, Britain # 8217 ; s foreign policy has a portion to play in the eruption of war but there is a far wider scope of issues to be considered every bit good. For case, Hitler # 8217 ; s policies as set out in # 8220 ; Mein Kampf # 8221 ; , which included a desire to undo the Treaty of Versailles, for living space and a Gro # 946 ; Germany, which finally resulted in the invasion of Poland and was every bit every bit critical a factor in the eruption of World War II. Ultimately, calming failed. The beginning of World War II forced the western Alliess to gain the defects of the policy of calming. Though calm ing appeared to be the solution to all jobs, it ensured a peace that would hold been really dearly-won to keep. To a great extent, calming was a class that tended to disregard some difficult political thoughts. The inquiry of the Rhineland business presented differences in diplomatic processs, proving the lastingness of the French-British confederation. The western Allies emerged from the war holding defeated Hitler and his ground forces in 1945, yet someway, the word # 8220 ; winner # 8221 ; seems inappropriate. # 167 ; Calvocoressi A ; Wint Total War # 167 ; Clarke, Peter Hope and Glory # 8211 ; Britain 1900-1990 ( 1996 ) # 167 ; Fuchser, L.W. Neville Chamberlain and Appeasement: A Study in the Politicss of History ( 1982 ) # 167 ; Lentin, A. Guilt at Versailles ; Lloyd George and the Pre-history of Appeasement ( 1994 ) # 167 ; Rock, W.R. British Appeasement in the 1930s ( 1977 )

The Appeal of Ib Tok Essay Topics 2011

The Appeal of Ib Tok Essay Topics 2011 A position paper is a personal statement of somebody's epistemology, even of an individual's own experience. When two pairs are found, they are broken up into an anterior or upper pair, and a posterior or under pair. In the event you want a bit more guidance on how to have an A EE. For the reason plenty of superb threads in regard to IB and additionally the appropriate way for you to develop into helpful. Some schools will provide you with a timeline of when you have to produce a topic, when you will need to meet up with your advisor and when certain drafts are due. Essay outline for college plays an important role. If you're, you are able to get your money back. Ensure you ask your IB coordinator if there's any essential paperwork. What Is So Fascinating About Ib Tok Essay Topics 2011? This ought to tie together the points made in the past paragraphs. This program is made for busy students, so you may quickly get clarity on what yo u want to do and how. Do you want a tok essay titles for any feasible difficulties with points to look at. This is tremendously useful. Where to Find Ib Tok Essay Topics 2011 Informative essay examples may be used for references. Essays are able to look very dull sometimes. With essay outline, they will prevent writer to get off topic or jumping from one argument to another argument that does not relate with what you are discussing. The essay has no spelling and grammar errors. Halve the particular topic it is possible to help your narrative essay. We've got a group of qualified essay writers which take care of ToK essays. Obviously there's a great deal more depth which we may go into about what makes a really excellent TOK essay, yet this structure will get you started. Experienced private on-line tok essay topics. As you start writing your introduction, bear in mind that you own a limit of 1200 to 1600 words. The source code does not just describe the webpage, but it's what generates the page in the very first place it's the underlying reality that underpins what we observe. If you're really stuck trying to discover a not too broad or narrow topic, I would suggest attempting to brainstorm a topic that utilizes a comparison. This explanation is crucial to any great example. It expands on everything within this essay and takes it up a couple of levels. Finding the concept demands attention! On how to be successful at areas like a difficult math. The way the case studies for all parts of the titles. What You Should Do to Find Out About Ib Tok Essay Topics 2011 Before You're Left Behind If possible, attempt to pull in a really different perspective, on your conclusion. What you should have to compose a matter or dissertation proposal. Since our knowledge is mostly based on intuitions and assumptions in regard to what an individual's behavior is likely to be5, it can then be inferred by historians what will occur in the future. A dilemma of knowledge matters. These publications have been helpful in the building of this informative article. Take a look at our lists You can write in the current tense if you wish to. Sometimes you could be asked to settle on a title from a list. These are the next titles which were given for 2011-2012. It's wit hout a doubt like some very very good benefit to make sure that you get word number involving numerous sections plus any in depth criteria about exactly the way to status large markings. The word does not have any reversal of termination, and might be regarded as singular or th grade peer editing rubric essay plural, at the option of the writer. It's such an excellent aid to have word counts of distinct sections and an in depth description about how to score high marks. Top quality control manual. The Fundamentals of Ib Tok Essay Topics 2011 Revealed The perfect way to learn to compose a narrative essay is to find a good example. There are several possible methods of structuring ideas in an essay, based on the topic. When choosing for a topic, make certain that there is an excellent quantity of things that you may speak about with the topic. You might deal with subject of privilege here.

LC Biology Exam Paper Topic Analysis HL

LC Biology Exam Paper Topic Analysis HLAs a Biology student, the first step in the process is to answer the LC Biology exam paper topic analysis HL questions. Although there are certain sections that can be quite simple and straightforward, but there are some that may appear to be quite obvious and on the surface, it would seem as if the students' hands were tied.As a student who is studying for the LC Biology exam paper topic analysis, it would be important to know that there are different types of exam papers and one is the sample exam paper topic analysis. This means that students can choose the exact sample question types and include all the answers to each one of them.As a student who has studied for the LC Biology exam paper topic analysis, it would be good to know that knowing the exact sample answers to the exam paper topic analysis is very helpful especially for those students who want to study as quickly as possible and already have prepared some questions of their own. Bec ause there are different sample types, knowing these will help students out in the long run and enable them to have the necessary ability in order to have the most specific and accurate answers to the sample questions.It is also important to know that the exam paper topic analysis requires students to have different skills in order to be able to answer the question types which are similar to each other. The answers will not work in any given situation, so it is important to have knowledge on various types of topics, knowing the differences between them and knowing what types of questions a student should prepare to answer.As a student who has studied for the LC Biology exam paper topic analysis, it would be important to know that knowing the various sample types can also be important because sometimes, the topics are not explained to students can be expected to figure out the concepts by themselves. There are three types of sample questions, which can be found in the sample exams.Th e first one is the example exam paper topic analysis; it is the sample exam paper topic analysis which can be used as a teaching and learning material for the students and can be used in various situations in a Biology classroom. These exam paper topic analysis can be used to demonstrate the concepts and show how a student can apply it to their own tests.In the second type of sample test questions, the students will answer multiple choice questions which have the answers given to them to do with the subjects of the Biology textbook. This means that when answering a question from a sample exam paper topic analysis, a student is giving an answer that will directly apply to a section in the book, demonstrating that the knowledge he/she possesses is practical.Last but not least, there is the test paper topic analysis. This is a sample which is mainly designed to assess the student's capability in utilizing the materials, abilities in organization and research skills which are usually us ed in the classroom.

A Fools Guide to Objective Research Essay Topics

A Fool's Guide to Objective Research Essay Topics The success of a research paper mostly is based on the topic, which is why a number of time is spent searching for the best research paper topics for college students. Nonetheless, it's right to have your own style instead of blindly feel the journals. To make sure that your paper doesn't discriminate anyone, attempt to imagine that you're reading it to the mixed audience of unique genders. So, you've realized that you're all set to compose your research paper. Research objective The key objective ought to be coupled with the hypothesis of the analysis. No warrant ought to be needed for search and seizures. At the close of the study, the null hypothesis is subsequently tested statistically. If there's a hypothesis involved, state how you mean to prove or disprove the hypothesis and broadly explain how you plan to achieve that. A 2-sided hypothesis needs to be used unless there's a superior justification for using a 1-sided hypothesis. The research hypothesis ought to be stated at the start of the study to steer the objectives for research. The Objective Research Essay Topics Trap Becoming a seasoned researcher and writer in any area or discipline takes lots of practice. Thus, ensure that it doesn't influence your objectivity. To be certain an objective is specific is to make sure the way it's described is observable. Being objective is having the ability to remove yourself from the personal emotions and thoughts you might have about the topic, while being in a position to examine fairly and critique either side of the argument you're discussing. The 30-Second Trick for Objectiv e Research Essay Topics So even when you believe the essay writing topic is too hard, our essay paper writers can solve it with no hassle. In circumstances when you get to pick the topic for an argumentative essay, you need to be wise and locate a title that will intrigue a reader. Researching the topic permits you to find out more about what fascinates you, and should you pick something you really like, writing the essay will be more enjoyable. Deciding upon an essay topic is just one of the most significant pieces of writing a terrific essay or paper. Many things require essay writing and should you decide on the proper topic, it is going to be a lot easier to compose your paper. There are a number of specialist essay writers that may cope at any essay in no moment. Therefore, if you're requested to draft an exploratory essay in your school, college or university, it's vital to select a topic that supplies you with the scope to learn more about the subject vividly and most of all learn some helpful lessons while working on the essay. Thus, prepare for collecting a good deal of reliable facts if you would like to create an effective objective essay. More research on the exact same topics is simply excellent. Since you can notice, nearly all of the topics mentioned in the above mentioned list focus do not own a definite answer. If a topic has been chosen by somebody else you're still welcome to claim it also. If you're confused with a number of interesting topics to research on the web, it's much better to determine what inte rests you the most. When you're picking your topic, bear in mind that it's much simpler to write about something which you currently have interest ineven in case you don't know a good deal about it. Then you're at the right spot! For instance, you can write about something that personally affects you or somebody you know. What's more, some people believe that everyone has to adhere to the fashion. The Advantages of Objective Research Essay Topics The exploratory essays are usually assigned to the students when there's a demand for them to understand something by themselves, instead of learning it within a conventional way from the teachers. Some students utilize the very first idea that arrives in their head and work on it, but the outcome isn't successful. By way of example, in college, you might be requested to compose a paper from the opposing viewpoint. To make certain your paper stands out you are able to also, benefit from choosing an unusual subject. Up in Arms Ab out Objective Research Essay Topics? Thus, you're expected to compose a research question. Also, constructing the perfect question will make sure that the right information concerning the topic can be found. The problem has to be well-defined. It is essential that you determine the Main Problem or the total problem and the Specific Problems connected with your thesis proposal.

Sample Essay For A Elemetary Class - A Learning Experience

Sample Essay For A Elemetary Class - A Learning ExperienceWhen writing a sample essay for an elementary class, you have a few options. You can just go by the book, or you can take your own creative approaches. Some people like to use grammar examples and use that to help them write their own essay.The idea is to get some different ideas, and then go with them to come up with a new one. If the topic of your essay relates to your specific subject, this can be a great help in making the assignment easier.It is also good to come up with several different topics that relate to your new essay. Try out all the different topics to see which ones you are most comfortable with. As long as you follow the theme of the topic, then you will be able to incorporate it into your essay without a problem.Make sure that you always have a paper to work on. This will make the project easier. You do not want to give up too early. Instead, you should keep at it until you feel confident that you can produce the perfect essay.Whether your class is first, second, or eleventh grade, you should still give it some thought when it comes to writing a sample essay for an elementary class. Even if you have not been to an elementary class before, you should still give it some thought when you start the project.Be sure that you come up with a specific topic to use. Remember that the topic will be something that you have already prepared. This means that you will be able to incorporate your ideas in your essay.You will also want to make sure that you stay organized. This means that you can work more efficiently. After all, this is going to be a part of your educational records, so you want to make sure that it is good quality.Also, you will want to make sure that you check out some sample essays before you start writing your own. This will give you an idea of what type of material to expect when you are finished. Just keep in mind that you want to make it a learning experience for your child.

MAMA MAMA!!!! Essays - DraftMaxima De Holanda, Corazn En Condominio

MAMA MAMA!!!! 1.- Mama, mama, ya no me gusta mi hermanito. Calla y sigue comiendo. 2.- Mama, ya no quiero conocer a mi abuelito. Calla y sigue escarbando. 3.- Mama, ya no quiero ir a europa. Callate y sigue nadando. 4.- Mama, ya no quiero piscina. Calla y sigue escupiendo. 5.- Mama, mama por que papa corre tanto?. Callate y recarga la ametralladora. 6.- Papa, papa que es un degenerado. Calla y sigueme lamiendo... 7.- Mama, en la escuela me dicen mentiroso. Callate que ni vas a la escuela... 8.- Mama, en la escuela me dicen mafioso. Ma?ana mismo voy a arreglar eso... Bueno mami pero que parezca un accidente... 9.Mama, mama, en la escuela me dicen peludo. Callate y peinate la cara!! 10.Mama, huele a muerto... Mama, huele a muerto... Mama. Mamaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! 11.- Mama, mama, en la escuela me dicen antipatico. Como? NO REPITO!!!! (M. Harris). Padre e Hijo San Pedro estaba con ganas de echarse una miada y le pide a Jesus que le cuide la puerta del cielo por un rato. En eso llega un viejito y Jesus le pregunta: -Abuelo, que hacia usted en la tierra? -Bueno, yo era carpintero, tenia unas longas barbas, muchas canas, y un hijo que todo el mundo adoraba, en especial los ni?os! Super emocionado, Jesus abre los brazos y dice: -PAPA!!!!!! Y el viejito todo emocionado: -PINOCHO!!!!!! y Eva dijo Jaimito se estaba quedando dormido en clase un dia, as? que la profesora le dijo a su compa?ero de detras que le pinchase con un bol?grafo cada vez que se quedase sobado. Al cabo de un rato, la profe pregunta: - A ver, Jaimito, quien cre? el cielo y la Tierra ? El de atras le pincha a Jaimito, que se despierta y dice : - ?Dios ! - Muy bien, Jaimito. La clase sigue, y al cabo de diez minutos Jaimito esta otra vez quedandose dormido, asi que la profesora pregunta de nuevo : - ?Jaimito, qui?n es el hijo de Dios ? El de atras le pincha mas fuerte, y Jaimito casi salta de la silla gritando: - Jesus !! - Muy bien, Jaimito. La clase continua, y Jaimito vuelve a dar unas cabezadas, asi que la profesora vuelve a preguntarle: - Jaimito, dime, ?qu? le dijo Eva a Adan despues de que Dios les expulsase del paraiso ? El compa?ero de detras de Jaimito le pega un puyazo con todas sus ganas, asi que Jaimito se levanta y le dice: - ?Si vuelves a clavarme esa mierda, te la arranco y te la meto por el culo, so cabr?n ! Por la "p" La maestra le pide a Jaimito que pronuncie una oraci?n donde todas las palabras empiezen por "P": Jaimito dice: Pido permiso para pasar por puente partido. Dice la maestra: muy bien jaimito. A ver tu Luisito Responde Luisito: "Pido prestado pinceles para pintar paisajes pintorescos" Muy bien Luisito. A ver pepito: Pepito responde "profesora Petra Perez Prieto pide Pepito pronuencie palabras principien por P...... Interrumpe la maestra y dice: Muy bien pepito tienes 20 Pepito continua su oraci?n: Paciencias pendejos, Profesora Petra Perez Prieto pide Pepito pipi para polvito, Pepito poco pendejo pone preservativo pipi para prevenir pre?ar profesora Petra Perez Prieto por puta. La monja que pasea con sus internas. Una monja iba caminando con un grupo de alumnas internas por el parque y de pronto ve un hombre desnudo tirado por el zacate boca arriba. La monja preocupada piensa que sus alumnas no deb?n ver esta vulgaridad y por lo tanto decide sentarse sobre el hombre y taparlo con su h?bito. Al poco tiempo despues comienza a dec?r. Hay San Marcelino, algo siento que no adivino. Hay San Pantale?n, me esta rompiendo el calz?n. Hay San Fern?ndo, siento que me estoy mariando. Hay San Bernardino, siento que me orino. Hay Santa Teresa, que hermosa cabeza. Hay Santa Irene, que grande la tiene. Hay Santa Br?gida, que cosa m?s r?gida. Hay Santa Marta, le calculo m?s de una cuarta. Hay Santo Tom?s, ya no aguanto m?s. Hay San Alejo, me esta rompiendo el pellejo. Hay San Ciriaco me la meto me la saco. Hay San Timoteo, que sabroso guineo. Hay Santa Magdalena, que rica melena. Hay San Clemente, me turba la mente. Hay San Benito, que es esto tan bonito. Hay San Antonio, que esto no sea el demonio. Hay San Juan, siento calambres que vienen y van. Hay San Orlando, siento que me estoy regando. Hay San Marcos, ya estoy sintiendo los charcos. Hay San Vicente, siento algo muy caliente. Hay Santa Canuta, me estoy volviendo una puta. Hay San Agust?n, esto es el f?n. Hay San Jerem?as, me siento aqu?